Being A Hockey Parent Can Be Super Fun
Hockey brings with it all of the best things that sport has to offer children. Fun, fitness, hard work, teamwork, perseverance, and so on. I firmly believe that youth athletics can be an amazingly positive experience for kids. However, the fun doesn't just have to be for kids.
It can be hard for competitive parents to not be that parent. It can be tempting to scream at the ref, get up in the coaches business, and treat that 8U game like it was the most important thing in life. We all want our children to succeed, to be given world class instruction, the best opportunity to succeed, and to always be treated fairly. Sadly, having these expectations is asking the impossible, and a recipe for disaster. It will make everyone involved miserable. The best thing I ever did was let go.
One of the rinks that we ended up frequenting had a bar/restaurant that straddled the two sheets of ice. We could sit comfortably behind glass windows, in relative warmth, and watch the games/practices. As a result, a group of us parents began having a tasty beverage, and while watching the kids have fun, we were having fun ourselves. We were detached. I wasn't tempted to yell things to my son (things he never listened to anyway) largely because I may not be the most tactful person on earth, but screaming in a restaurant is beyond the threshold for acceptable behavior, even for me. It became a time to have a tasty beverage with friends and watch our kids careen around the ice and occasionally into each other. They did their thing and we did ours.
I noticed that my stress levels and anxiety decreased significantly. I stopped caring about every little thing. As long as the kids were moving, playing, and getting involved, rock on. While they play, we socialize and relax. The three to four hour blocks of weekend time (driving, getting dressed, and an hour of ice time) that were previously carved out just for the child, became a time for us too. We began to look forward to our experience separate from that of our child's experience.
I still watch intently. I love to watch my boy play. I still care about his development. I'm just not caught up in it. He dresses, though I still tie his skates, and we hang out with other parents and have a great time being super happy that we're not out in the blazing sun or pouring rain watching the little guy stand around for an hour as the grass grows beneath his feat, hoping he doesn't get the Houston Astros treatment right in the head. Being a hockey parent can be a lot of fun, especially when I let the coaches coach, the kids play, and the refs, well they're refs, they can't help it. Cheers to a good time.
It can be hard for competitive parents to not be that parent. It can be tempting to scream at the ref, get up in the coaches business, and treat that 8U game like it was the most important thing in life. We all want our children to succeed, to be given world class instruction, the best opportunity to succeed, and to always be treated fairly. Sadly, having these expectations is asking the impossible, and a recipe for disaster. It will make everyone involved miserable. The best thing I ever did was let go.
One of the rinks that we ended up frequenting had a bar/restaurant that straddled the two sheets of ice. We could sit comfortably behind glass windows, in relative warmth, and watch the games/practices. As a result, a group of us parents began having a tasty beverage, and while watching the kids have fun, we were having fun ourselves. We were detached. I wasn't tempted to yell things to my son (things he never listened to anyway) largely because I may not be the most tactful person on earth, but screaming in a restaurant is beyond the threshold for acceptable behavior, even for me. It became a time to have a tasty beverage with friends and watch our kids careen around the ice and occasionally into each other. They did their thing and we did ours.
I noticed that my stress levels and anxiety decreased significantly. I stopped caring about every little thing. As long as the kids were moving, playing, and getting involved, rock on. While they play, we socialize and relax. The three to four hour blocks of weekend time (driving, getting dressed, and an hour of ice time) that were previously carved out just for the child, became a time for us too. We began to look forward to our experience separate from that of our child's experience.
I still watch intently. I love to watch my boy play. I still care about his development. I'm just not caught up in it. He dresses, though I still tie his skates, and we hang out with other parents and have a great time being super happy that we're not out in the blazing sun or pouring rain watching the little guy stand around for an hour as the grass grows beneath his feat, hoping he doesn't get the Houston Astros treatment right in the head. Being a hockey parent can be a lot of fun, especially when I let the coaches coach, the kids play, and the refs, well they're refs, they can't help it. Cheers to a good time.
Comments
Post a Comment